The American Dream

I've always been a big believer in capitalism. I've always thought hard work was a great thing. I still think it is. I think capitalism, for the most part, tends to work in large societies where the consumer is smart enough to take control of the free enterprise system. Here is what I'm coming to realize: desire and ambition are not bad things, but without these pointed toward God they can create much evil. I used to get upset thinking about the future. I have so many dreams, so many ambitious yearnings for success that I thought that there were many, many good things that could get in the way of an American dream. In my college education, my professors have posed a very realistic question: children or career? Professional musician or teacher? Open to music or open to my quack religious beliefs?

I made a decision several years back (now I know I didn't know what I was getting into, and I probably still don't) to follow Christ, to take up His cross and follow Him. I'm sitting at work right now, and some things are starting to creep into my mind and my heart. When I made that decision, I laid down my life. It's no longer mine to live. What a freedom I have now. I can go out and fail multiple times over and not become a great composer and not become a great conductor and maybe only touch a few lives with the music in which I'm involved. It's up to me to make wise decisions, to align my life with Christ's, to follow Him. He carries the burden of my "successful" life. I don't have to be scared in the future or now. I don't have to worry about my professors' narrow-minded, absolute statements of fear. God has ordained my days, and nothing can get in the way of plans for me. Whatever may come, be it a life of poverty and suffering or fame, or even both, I trust in my God to define the idea of success. I no longer want to pursue the American dream. I want something so much bigger. I want to pursue a heavenly dream, one that God counts as worthy.